Khidmat Negara, Tanggungjawab Bersama!

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We were about to put our heads down on the pillows 2 nights ago when we heard a loud thud coming from the study room.

Gdbooom!!...Boom!!!.Oh MY GOD!!!!!

mama: Apa tu, papa, cuba you pi tengok, Ikram kena electrocuted ke?

Papa rushed out of bed but before he could reach the door, it was already opened by Ikram.

Ikram: Papa, mama, my name is listed as a candidate for the National Service next year! Oh sh*t!! Oh Sh*t!!!!! ......

mama: How do you know, Ikram?

Ikram: I've just checked it out at their website!

Ya Allah, macam mana nak calm Ikram down ni. He has always been against the idea of having to do the National Service. He said that it's a waste of his bloody 3 months!

Ikram: May I pretend to be suffering from OCD or something??......

Papa: Since you have no choice but to do it, you might as well enjoy the experience, Ikram. Think of it positively, you'll be given training in self reliance, character building, appreciation for your country and you'll be a stronger person when you come out.
If you choose to moan and groan, you will be miserable every single day of your life when you are there!...

mama: Kesian Ikram. Hope they will allow you to use fork and spoon for your meals.
( Ikram doesn't know how to eat using his fingers...) ,
lepas tu Ikram tak payah lah nak tunjuk2 tere, ikut aje apa instructor tu suruh.
Kalau ada budak nak rebut2 remote control tv, biarkan ajer..
(I was reffering to a boy who was killed by a fellow participant over a fight for TV remote control).
Cuba avoid masuk dalam air kotor yang bertakung.
(A few students were hospitalised due to bacteria infection as a result of being soaked in a puddle of water contaminated by animals).
Kalau Ikram takde duit, telefon ajer mama, tak perlu ikut instructor pergi Bank!
(A girl claimed to be raped by the instructor while hitching a ride from him to the bank)

With all these worries, mama pun go: Oh sh*t!!, Oh sh*t!!!!!!....
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The Wisdom Tooth.

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Ikram woke up in pain yesterday. He requested that I made a dental appointment for him as he felt that half his face was acting in concert, determined to make his entire day miserable.

I picked him up after school and sent him direct to the Dentist's chair.

Dr. Putri: Oh my! You have 3 wisdom teeth coming out at three corners of your gums all at the same time!!!!! How old are you?

Ikram: 17!

I had my last tooth coming out while celebrating my 49th birthday. I was in excruciating pain that I could count the throbs of my gum to be in the same rythmn as the pounding of pillars at the construction site of Mutiara Damansara. Henceforth, I gave up my right to blame the lack of wisdom tooth for all my childish antics.

The children were sorry for me, they bought a Spa treatment as a birthday gift hopefully to sooth away the pain. Since it was the Father's Day celebration, papa got to go as well.

Halfway through the treatment, I got to soak myself in the bathtub strewn with rose petals of different colours.

mama: Eh, papa! I am bathing in 'air bunga', very soon I will be able to find a partner and get married to a handsome and rich Datuk!!!!!

Papa shouted from the bench where he was covered in a plastic wrap not unlike a mummia, in his thick Penang slang:
'Bukan ka hang baghu nak tumbuh gigi, dah gatai nak menikah????'

Ha, ha, ha....
We both laughed so loud that the guest next door must have expected that we were up to something lucrative....

I digress.

Back at the dentist office, Dr. Putri explained that 2 of the teeth were nicely placed. The one that bothered Ikram was on the upper left gum where the poor fella actually leaned towards the inside of Ikram's cheek for lack of space. It would require simple extraction, however, if I were to do it today, the inflamation would cause Ikram much pain.

mama: what do you propose as the best option for Ikram?
Dr. Putri: we will treat the sore with anti-biotic and pain-killer for 3 days, when the tooth is stabilised, I will proceed with the extraction.
mama: OK then, we'll see you again in 3 days' time. Until then, will Ikram still be in pain?
Dr. Putri: It should be bearable after 24 hours of medication.

On the way home, Ikram said he half expected that I would instruct the Dentist to just proceed with the extraction and do away with all the hassle!.

Ikram: But you consider my best interest and comfort, first and foremost. I don't think I will ever get a better mum than you, mama!!!

mama: Ooouuww, I love you too, Ikram...
Welcome to the world of wisdom!!!
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Size '0'

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I must be the most backward mom in Lembah Klang for it was only last weekend that I know there is such a thing as a size '0' for a dress!!

I accompanied Dilla for shopping and I found out the reality behind her grouses all these while, that the fashion market is hostile to people her size!
Dilla, at 23+, could still fit into her clothes purchased when she was in standard 5, but the problem is she now has to wear an adult's image in order to be taken seriously as an auditor from a prestigious company in the city.

Our mission was to get her new 'working clothes', but those are not available at the Children's Department!. 'Miss Selfridges' are too frilly and sexy, 'mng' too casual, 'Zara' too heavy.
Thank God for 'Urban & Co'! I was at the point of giving up when we walked towards the half asleep salesgirl who turned out to be such a pleasant and helpful soul.

mama: Do you have suits in her size?
girl: Size 0, yes we do have a few left.
mama: Take them all and let my daughter try them on.

While Dilla was at the changing room, I asked the girl what's size '0', i.e. zero, did it mean there was no size at all????....
The salesgirl explained that size '0' is for adult with a teenager body who needs grownup designs. You can't go to work in 'little-bo-peep' dress bought from the children department, can you?

We finally managed to get some nice suitable stuff which could last Dilla for a few months. Infact, we purchased every piece that came in size '0' at the store that day, except for one black attire which papa said should only be worn to the boss's funeral.
Aaauuww papa, you are so cruel!!!

Later in the evening, I read in the paper that Victoria Beckham too is wearing a size '0'.
wow, what do you know, suddenly I understood what size '0' she was referring to!!!!
According to her, she could not fit into any clothes without doing much alteration on her own. She declared to have a waist of a seven year old, which means she could actually share her son Brooklyn's jeans. Imagine, David Beckham could be much richer if she should just do that.... (especially if her claim that she pigs on her food is not true!).
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The World Cup

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The World Cup fever is finally really going to be over this weekend!!

The whole nation had been gripped by the euphoria, just flip through the daily newspapers, listen to the radio, switch on the telly or have dinner at the mamak's stall..everything revolves around the soccer mania.

Hopefully our own national soccer team has learned a lot from the massive exposure. The technics and the strategies, and the most important the killer instinct of wanting to win!

In my house, I don't have to scan through the morning newspaper to realise that the world cup is still ongoing.
I just have to look in despair at Imran's drooping head on the table over breakfast!
and Dilla's red eyes on her way to work...

mama: Imran, the late nights to morning soccer games are doing you no good! Why don't you stop watching and get back to normal life?

Imran: Ha, ha, mama, you are so funny!

mama: Funny you said? I can be real funny by just switching off the Astro splitter in my room, lock my door and pretend to be dead until the next morning!!!!
Funny hah!?!
I still can't tell my mother to try not to be funny even at my age!
Do you know that?!?.....
Huh!!!.
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